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It’s not just the onions!

(Posted by Gayle)

After reading my last couple of blog posts, you may wonder about me (and you probably should.)  Here’s the deal, I am deeply romantic, but if you look at this definition:

1.  inclined toward or suggestive of the feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love : a romantic candlelit dinner.
2.  relating to love, esp. in a sentimental or idealized way : a romantic comedy.

I lean more towards 1 than 2. Mystery and excitement are compelling, but what happens when the mystery wears off?  That’s partly why I cry at weddings.  I know the couple is going to come to a day when they don’t feel like they are falling in love anymore and they may mistakenly think it means they’ve “fallen out of love.”  But I’m telling you, just because you wake up one morning and don’t feel head over heels, swooney in the stomach, or ready for a roll (so to speak) it does not, I repeat, DOES NOT mean your fairy tale is over.

What it means is you have to look for new angles in your fairy tale.  One of the sweetest stories I’ve ever heard was from one of our “kids”.  Everyone in the house was sick (the two year old, the infant, and mom).  He found himself on 2 year old patrol for a couple of days.  He said he’d never felt more connected to, or more love for anyone than he did when he was holding his child over the toilet so the vomit would make it into the bowl.  It’s his fairy tale come true.  He was living the dream of being a loving husband and father!

For me, one of my fairy tales moments with Ron happened on our anniversary last year.  We had gone to dinner at a very special restaurant.  I didn’t have much of an appetite and I knew something was wrong.  Turns out I was getting sick and shortly after we got home I threw up and had to go to bed.  Ron and I were emailing each other from within the same house that night.  I felt so miserable.  He asked me if I would marry him again on our 25th wedding anniversary three years down the road. ( I said yes.)

So I cry for those newlyweds because I know their vows represent hope and innocence about their future.  I want them to be strong – strong enough to fight for their love even when they don’t feel very loving.  I’m in their corner because I want them to be one of the “few, the brave, the bold” and “boldly go” where fewer and fewer are going – into long term committed relationships that are full of…. balance.

(What the?!  Did she just say balance?  That’s not a very romantic word.  What’s wrong with her?!) If you want to find out what’s wrong with her and how the word balance might just be one of the sexier words you’ll ever hear, then stay tuned ;~)

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