You decide.

(Guest post by Earnest D. Cember)

Earnest posted this blog several months ago.  As you will see, he’s a bit of an hillbilly savant and curmudgeon at the same time.  Maybe if I keep him around I can just let him get grumpier.  Then I won’t have to.  Here’s Earnest’s blog:

I think you’ve figured out by now that even though I have hillbilly in my blood I don’t like to see the English language butchered. Well, last night I actually said “I’m down with that.” That frightened me. Where did that come from? I don’t think I’ve never said it in my life until last night. As I become a “writer,” I’m also discovering a lot of “thats” in my writing.  What am I doing to the language? Read the rest of this entry »

Indeed – certain age gap relationships may keep the grim reaper away a little longer!

(posted by Ron)

In an August 2007 article in LiveScience.com Jeanna Bryner hypothesizes that “May/December Couples Boost Human Lifespan.” That’s quite an interesting idea, particularly considering that it makes some evolutionary sense.

Ms. Brynner cites several sources to support her hypothesis, all of which seem to point in the same direction.  Although females tend to lose their reproductive capacity in their fifties men do not.  On the average men are fertile until at least their seventies and some even into their nineties.  She states that, at the time of her article, “90-year-old Nanu Ram Jogi from India reportedly became the world’s oldest father when he announced his 21st child…”  Read the entire article here.

Ron’s Commentary

Robert Heinlein is one of my favorite authors.  In 1941 he introduced science fiction fans to the Howard Family.  A wealthy man named Howard encouraged certain individuals to marry because they had living grandparents who were quite old.  His foundation then paid significant amounts for each child they delivered.  Needless to say there are some large families in the series.

Our species has been interested in extending our lifespan since we ran away from the first dinosaur.  Ira Howard may have a good idea but, until now I haven’t seen any non-science fiction studies.  Now, age gap couples are putting their oar into the genetic pool (so to speak.)

In the article noted above, we see that older men/younger women pairings often result in children.  Some quite famous examples are noted.  It hypothesizes that potent older men tend to pass on the gene for longevity to their children.  That’s only slightly more scientific than Ira Howard’s ideas but who’s to say they both don’t have something good there.

So, go for it age gap couples!  Let’s see how much you can boost our lifespan!  Wouldn’t it be ironic we if ended up being fountains of youth?!

Not if your wife is your “opponent.”

(Posted by Ron)

Is it fun to hit each other in the face?  It is if you are doing it via a WII (No, not W. W. II.  That’s wee, as in Nintendo).  We actually need another controller before we can “fight” each other, but weeee will Wii! This holiday we have bowled, played tennis, guitar and golf, all without leaving the living room.

My daughter commented on one of Gayle’s posts and part of her comment said that being married to Gayle has kept me young.  In a way she’s right.  Gayle and I do lots of things that my older relatives would have never considered.  After all, at my age I should be “enjoying” retirement, whatever that means, not playing video games.

Since we’ve begun this website and the book on May December relationships I have learned a great deal about the truths and misconceptions surrounding age-gap couples.  Many of these lessons are described elsewhere in our website.  Many are yet to be written about.

The main lesson that I learn over and over is that relationships are seldom about age.  They are about the love, compatibility and adaptability of the partners.  Do you know many (almost) 66 year old men who are learning to play a Nintendo Wii?  It appeared in the house as a 22nd anniversary present to us.  I never considered that I would still enjoy competitive video games, but I do.

So what’s this May December Secret?

Aging is often a state of mind.

Think about that if you are considering an age gap relationship.  The love, of course, is ageless.  But how about energy levels?  Interests?  Sense of adventure?  They are certainly important, regardless of your ages.

I believe successful May December relationships also provide something much different that what we are told.  Most of the research wants us to believe they are about men and women looking for father or mother figures or having mid-life crises.  That’s often true, but in my humble opinion they also provide the yin to our yang.  I’ve learned to love museums and hiking, and feeling younger than my years is the norm.

So I may have to wrap my knee before I start, but I’ve found a very good source of the exercise I need.  Playing an hour of tennis in the living room with Gayle is hard work.  I even have to get off the couch.  Our age differences once again are not an issue.  Beating her at tennis is, though.  And I will again, I think.  If I don’t I’ll get that other controller and we’ll see who’s the best boxer!

No, but 66 are quite a few!

(Posted by Ron)

• Yesterday was our 22nd anniversary.  Gayle was sick with the stomach virus I had last week and spent almost the entire day in bed.
• We’ve started early on Christmas decorating.  Some years can be quite a production in the Lambert/Luster household.  This may be one of those.  Family starts arriving on Wednesday.
• Nancy came over yesterday to help decorate.  We spent a couple of hours repairing the wiring on the new last year, pre-lit, going to save a lot of time each year, expensive Christmas tree.  Nancy did a beautiful job, by the way.
• I was going to help with decorating but got too deeply into cleaning the garage which had become so cluttered it was dangerous to walk through.  Why the garage?  It’s where the decorations are stored.  I had to find them.
• Oh, I found the laundry out there, too.  I’ve worked on it all weekend.
• Did I mention that I had my sweet little almost 17 year old Cocker/Chow mix put to sleep this weekend?
• Somehow I remembered to go to “Babys-R-Us” today for the “dog” gates we needed to protect the kitchen from marauding babies.
• It’s 10:30 on Sunday night and Gayle just asked if I had written a post for tomorrow.  I didn’t say what immediately came to mind.  Instead I just said no.  After all, I’m very, very tired.

In less than three weeks I will celebrate my 66th birthday.  Gayle, as you know, is a youngster with 15 fewer years on the clock than me.  Otherwise, why would we be writing these posts?  22 years ago I would have been almost as tired after a weekend such as this.  The thought of “writing a post” would have been just as unappetizing then as tonight.

Then I realized I do have a post.  A post about being too tired to write a post.  In the past few years I’ve begun to ponder my aging.  Tonight was one of those times.  I’m almost 66!  I’m tired!  How can you ask me to think about writing?  Then it hit me.  I could change those numbers to 44 and the words would still be much the same.

I don’t “remember” the passage of those 22 years.  I don’t “remember” getting to 66.  Most of the time those numbers don’t bother me and this is one of those times!  They really are just numbers.

I have a feeling this post is going to be used against me when I want to be 66 again.

(Uh oh, could this be my real expiration date?)

(Posted by Ron)

Unlike what Gayle wrote in her post about my stroke, this was exactly what was going through my head that fateful day as I lay in the emergency room in Austin, Texas.  When I had a stroke in 2003 I had no idea what OMG or WTF meant, but it didn’t matter.  I was thinking all of those thoughts with no acronyms and without cleaning them up for a website.  I was scared!  While Gayle was in the waiting room reliving the day her father died I was laying on an examination table, alone, remembering every person I knew who had strokes.  I saw paralyzed faces, heard slurred words and saw impaired arms and legs.  Let me say it again, I was scared! Read the rest of this entry »