What?  (Posted by Ron)

OK, this is another post about our new favorite television show, Modern Family.  Jay, always the frugal December takes Gloria, the hot May to view two above ground crypts that are only three slots down from a famous gangster.  The young wife, Gloria, is not a bit ready to deal with death and refuses to have the discussion.  The subject of Gloria remarrying after Jay dies also comes up.  Of course they assume Jay will die first.  After all, he is the December.

Back at home, Jay gives Gloria an empty coffee can to use to keep his ashes on the mantle.  His ulterior motive is that the “putz” that Gloria marries will have to stare at his ashes.  Yes, Modern Family is a comedy, but it is one of the most popular television shows, indicating to me that Gayle and I aren’t the only ones interested in May-December relationships.

We often get questions about the risks a younger partner takes when entering into an age-gap relationship.  Who will die first?  Will the younger partner have to take care of an aging partner who can no longer care for him/herself?  These are definitely legitimate questions that should be examined.  Not, however, as Jay did by taking Gloria to a cemetery.

There will be no coffee cans on the mantle in the home of Ron and Gayle.  Many years ago we had conversations about our deaths and how we would handle burial.  We both came to the conclusion that cremation made sense and that we wished to have our ashes sent over the Lower Falls of the Yellowstone River, one of the most beautiful places on earth.  The ashes of our friend Fred and several of our beloved pets have already taken that trip.  (It’s not exactly legal, by the way.)  Our trust documents have instructions for our burial.

Planning makes sense in any relationship.  It’s really no more important in an age-gap relationship that one in which the partners are close in age.  There are no guarantees who will leave this life first.  We’ve also planned for care as we age.  Neither of us wishes to be an unnecessary burden on the other so we’ve had long-term care insurance for several years.

Modern Family is fun to watch.  It points out more problems that solutions, however, so you have to pick and choose what you take away from it.  I love watching it because in many ways it is a microcosm of our own lives.  There won’t be coffee cans for us, though.  The Lower Falls beckon.

Eat, Drink, Take Pictures, and Decorate!

(Posted by Gayle)

The Lambert Jr.’s have been here most of the week.  We’ve had so much fun.  The Thanksgiving spread was yummy.  When the kids weren’t keeping us running, the new Wii was a belly laughing blast.  I dare anyone to cross my path.  I’ve discovered I’m a wicked boxer!  The tree is up and the Christmas lights are lit.

We spent an afternoon at the Arboretum having family pics clicked.  Just wanted to share a few shots.  Click on any of them to see a larger image (click a second time to super size them.)

What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life – to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.  ~George Eliot

Get the scoop, the whole scoop, and nothing but the scoop!

(Posted by Ron & Gayle)

We were recently interviewed by the relentlessly awesome Dixie Feldman who writes a blog for WETV.Com.  We’ll be sharing the interview in its entirety over the next few weeks.  Enjoy!

What are the benefits and challenges to a M-D marriage?

Gayle: For me one of the best benefits is grandchildren without having had to give birth or raise a pack of teenagers!   I know the family issues can be a challenge, but once you work through them there are just so many benefits.  Our holidays are insane with 4 married children and 12 grandchildren.  We never get to see them enough and that’s a challenge.  But there is never a lack of love and that’s a major benefit.  Let’s not forget that whole great sex thing!  An older man can set the bar pretty darn high.  So the challenge might be that you are ruined for future lovers.  I guess you could always take that knowledge with you, find a younger man, and mentor him – thus leaving the world in better shape than when you found it!

Ron: I’ve mentioned several already.  Their sexual relationship can be both a benefit or a challenge depending upon the age and/or health of the older partner.   Finances can also be a benefit or a challenge.  Many older men are already established in their careers and are financially secure.  On the other hand, many are coming out of divorces that have significantly damaged their financial stability and it may carry over into the new relationship.  Other benefits are the maturity of the older man.  His interest in being an active partner.  His ability to listen better than many younger men.  Challenges are the social stigma that is sometimes attached to these relationships.  Also, the potential for health issues with the older male as the marriage progresses.  Family issues are also often a problem.  Children and parents are sometimes very much against the relationship.

Stay tuned, more is coming. Don’t miss a word?  Subscribe to our RSS feed now.  And while you’re at it, leave us a comment – we’d love to hear what you have to say!

More of the scoop, the whole scoop, and nothing but the scoop!

(Posted by Ron & Gayle)

We were recently interviewed by the relentlessly awesome Dixie Feldman who writes a blog for WETV.Com.  We’ll be sharing the interview in its entirety over the next few weeks.  Enjoy!

What are the benefits to a woman entering a May December romance?

Gayle: When you are with an older man his experience is evident in, shall we just say, MANY areas.  There is also a sense of stability that comes with his wisdom.  If you are dating a younger man, you bring experience to the table and it’s fun to have someone youthful with which to share your life.

Ron: In most cases an older man is more mature than the men younger women are used to dating.  Older men are usually more attentive to their younger partner.   They are not as likely to spend a great deal of time with “the boys” and instead are with the woman more.  Depending on their age and health older men are  much more likely to be good sexual partners.  They are more attentive to the woman’s needs and are more likely to stay engaged with the woman after sex as opposed to “rolling over and going to sleep.”

Stay tuned, more is coming. Don’t miss a word?  Subscribe to our RSS feed now.  And while you’re at it, leave us a comment – we’d love to hear what you have to say!

… to stop getting “old fart” cards on your birthday?

(Posted by Ron)

Ron Lambert - Fact or Crap?

THE birthday card!

It started on my 40th birthday but instead of a card a black funeral wreath was delivered to my office.  It seems like I’ve gotten some sort of condolence wish each year since, except for my 50th.  After Gayle learned that I never had a birthday party as a child (that I remember), she made my 50th very special.  She arranged a very special party at a friend’s home.  Everyone came in costume – dressed like me.  They were wearing nightshirts (another story), had on glasses, mustaches, and had even padded their tummies.  We ate grilled cheese sandwiches and hot dogs, two of my favorite foods.  I don’t remember receiving any “old” anything cards then, but I’ll bet I did.

As the years have passed I’ve continued to get cards that “celebrate” my longevity.  99 and 9/10ths of them are funny and loving.  One of my sons-in-law and I have a running joke with old fart cards.  I enjoy our competition.

So another year has passed and, sure enough, I got another of those cards Saturday night.  A picture of it is on this post.  It came from two of my dearest friends.  Everyone at the table enjoyed it.  So what were my feelings about this particular card?

• It was funny and I genuinely liked it.
• I was aware of the love with which it was given.
• I received it in a restaurant, surrounded by people who love me and who, I might add, are all younger than me by quite a few years.
• I don’t think they really pay attention to my age except when buying birthday cards.

So, I ask again, when do I get old enough to stop getting “old fart” cards on my birthday?  Not soon, I hope.  Each year I receive them means I have been privileged to be alive and surrounded by family and friends whom I know love me.  I get them from friends.  I get them from my kids.  I even have a running competition with one of my sons-in-law for the worst old fart card each year.   I get them from lots of people who love me.  I get them because I am still here and I expect there to be many more “old fart” card opportunities.  In fact, on my 100th birthday I’ll buy one for myself.

I have to say this, though.  It eases the sting just a little to know that Gayle is now getting them, too.  We may have an age-gap, but some things transcend the gap.

Us